RULES FOR HEALTHY TOILET ENGAGEMENT

This post is aimed at drawing attention to the sanitation crisis. It’s a good cause since sanitation is a global problem as stats say that about 700 000 children die every year from diarrhea caused by unsafe water and poor sanitation, amongst other problems caused by poor sanitation.

But let me take sanitation closer to home and chat about personal sanitation and hygiene. I’m a self-confessed hygiene freak, to the point where I think I have OCD when it comes to personal sanitation.

I always imagine that there are thousands of ‘toilet’ germs floating around in the toilet space and therefore it has to be impeccably clean. I don’t even trust my friends’ toilet spaces because they don’t necessary adhere to the rules that I made up in my head about how clean and well-kept a toilet needs to be.

First of all, a toilet needs to be cleaned every day, and toilet cleaner instructions need to be followed thoroughly. The toilet cleaner that I use says that it needs to sit in the toilet bowl for 15 minutes before scrubbing the toilet clean, and I follow those instructions carefully.

I sometimes scrub the toilet bowl so hard and thoroughly that you’d think that it will break apart and release butterflies in the air. But it has to be impeccably clean, and I believe that this is the standard of a super-clean toilet.

I boil up with rage at people that don’t flush my toilet. Not flushing the toilet leaves thousands of germs in the toilet bowl that creep up onto your private parts as you use the toilet, leaving you susceptible to various viral infections.

And the disgusting smell of urine that gets entrenched into the toilet space is enough to make any human waste removal system protest against using the toilet.

I believe that when you release feces from your body, you shouldn’t sit on the toilet for long hours listening to music or reading a book. If you do that, you’re leaving waste in the toilet for too long, which is breeding ground for all those viral germs that will cause heinous infections on your private parts.

And the smell is just unbearable, especially if you haven’t detoxed in a while. You’ll die from your own stench.

If anyone pees on my toilet seat, they receive the full wrath of my rage. Peeing on seats is absolutely unacceptable.

All I’m saying is that personal sanitation and hygiene is important. If anyone comes into my toilet space and dares to break any of these above-mentioned things, I’ll flush them down the toilet in hygienic fits of rage.